Since INTPs can be such an enigma in the world of dating and flirting, I conducted a poll on Instagram to ask INTPs (or at least people who perceive themselves to be INTPs) how they flirt. Since this is collected from Instagram and their personality types were not verified, the accuracy and validity of the information provided is compromised. However, it’s always interesting to hear from the perspectives of the types themselves. So, bearing in mind that the information was collected in an unscientific way, below are the top 8 ways that INTPs flirt.
The number one answer when INTPs were asked how do you flirt is that they don’t at all. They answered “I don’t”, “badly”, “weirdly”, “awkwardly”, and “just not happening”. For all those INTPs out there who don’t flirt, maybe this article can be helpful to you. You can learn from other people who report that they are INTPs and how they can flirt or maybe learn from other types like ESTPs who I think are the best flirts ;).
The number two answer was fun facts. I love this answer because it’s so funny to imagine. I’m imagining I see a cute guy over there. I look at him like and decide I’m going to go tell him that a blue whale’s heart is the size of a Volkswagen Beetle. Although, honestly, I love fun facts so much that I think this is an amazing answer that would definitely have worked if someone used it on me because it draws people in and sets you apart.
The number three answer was compliments. I would say if an INTP does compliment you, they must think very highly of you because I don’t think INTPs give compliments often. They’re also awkward when receiving compliments because they might not like that kind of praise and not know how to react. So, if an INTP does compliment you, they’re definitely interested.
The number four answer, which I think is a huge one for INTPs, was humor. The INTPs that I’ve known are super playful. They love banter, sarcasm, puns, dark humor, and all kinds of stuff. One person wrote insults and I think that when INTPs do insult, it’s always in a playful way of yes, you’re an idiot, but I’m also an idiot, so I like you. Some other examples were “say weird shit until they laugh” and “like a five-year-old boy that bullies/annoys the girl he has a crush on.” That sounds like a very INTP-ish way to go about flirting because they’re very playful and fun.
The number five answer sort of fits in the category of conversation which can be broken up into 3 sub categories. The first is testing their worldview, which I don’t know if I would call testing a person’s worldview flirting; I think it’s more trying to see what kind of person they are, and if you’re interested in them, and if you want to continue talking to them. I guess if you mean testing their worldview as in taking an interest in what the other person thinks, then it could maybe count as flirting. The second one is arguing dumb topics. I think they are meaning to infuse a little bit of humor and playfulness there. This final one for conversation I really like. The people just wrote, “Listen to what the other person says.” I like that because it’s so simple but so meaningful. But it’s also funny because flirting is just not totally disregarding the other person and not listening at all. If you listening, flirting has been achieved. INTPs can be rather aloof and not pay attention to what the other people in the room are doing, so I guess listening counts as flirting.
The number six answer is similar- paying attention to them. This is also great because it’s as opposed to just not paying attention to them. For INTPs the message is I’m here, I’m talking to you, I’m paying attention to you, so, that obviously means I like you. They also frequently said “studying the person.” I think this is a big one for INTPS because they are all about learning and understanding. If they like you, they’re going to want to study you.
The number seven answer was looks from afar. Now, what they wrote here though is not probably what you’re thinking in terms of looks from afar where it’s like a very coy, interested but at the last minute look away shyly, cute, flirty look. It’s we have here, “creepy stares from afar,” and “investigates and stare.” Oh, INTPs.
Number Eight, I think this is also an extremely realistic way that I have seen INTPs flirt. That is just online because INTPs are much more comfortable online. They’ll send you memes and emojis to be a little bit playful and flirty, but then if you get them in real life, they’re going to have to develop that real life comfort as well. If you’ve been flirting with an INTP online and then you get them in person, you may wonder, oh, where’s that person that I was talking to before? It’s not that they meet up with you and they don’t like you; it’s just they’re not comfortable yet with you in the outer-net versus the Internet.
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