In all their relationships, INFPs care very deeply for people they’re close to and want to share a deep connection. INFPs thrive on sharing and relating feelings with loved ones. Unfortunately, they have a hard time finding that special person to share their whole selves with.
INFPs don’t believe in rushing or forcing anything in relationships. They believe that what is meant to be will come to them. Their philosophy is to take things slowly and let love gradually unfold. They look for someone who they perceive to be equally deep, complex, and morally righteous as they are. As such, it takes time to figure out if the person is everything they hope they are. Further, INFPs can fall victim to unrequited love where they are pining over someone without ever expressing it. For them, absence often makes the heart grow fonder as love lives in their imagination.
As idealists, INFPs search for love that is intimate, beautiful, and real. INFPs can fall in love with the idea of love more easily than they can with a person. They find that most people just don’t measure up to their idealistic standards. The fact that they have high standards doesn’t mean that their partner has to be perfect. INFPs love the quirks and imperfections, as long as they’re genuine. If INFPs seek any perfection it’s moral perfection by completely living their values and beliefs. They want their partners to be the good people that they see at their core. If they see their partners acting out of line with their morals, they correct them. In a relationship where the INFP feels secure, they open up to their partner and share parts of themselves that they keep secret. In this way, they place their heart in your care. They see meaning all around them and often project deep feelings and meaning on the littlest actions. The smallest gestures of affection mean so much to them and they hold their memories close to their heart.
INFP relationships are among the most difficult to get off the ground. They speak in terms of subtle meanings and are the least likely to initiate the first kiss. They feel things deeply and take their relationships seriously. If you’re dating or trying to date an INFP, download our guide with our top 20 pieces of practical advice for dating this type.
When it comes to flirting, INFPs are the kings and queens of subtlety. INFPs tend to think they’re terrible at flirting or don’t flirt at all because it makes them feel shy and awkward. They’ll often be vague or seem to ignore their crush entirely yet expect them to pick up on their little hints. However, they won’t necessarily pick up on subtle cues from the other person. So, there’s that barrier. Additionally, it’s unlikely for an INFP to directly ask out their crush. Though they don’t like to play games, INFPs engage in a sort of dance of stares from afar and blushing until they can get to know the person more.
On the other hand, if they’re not being quiet and ignoring their crush, INFPs can become giggly, bubbly, and talkative around them. Still, they may not talk directly to their crush at this stage. They want to lure their crush in by showing that they’re fun and happy. Though INFPs take relationships extremely seriously, they are also quite playful in love. They get nervous and have a hard time flirting openly. However, they love to show their goofy side once they get comfortable. Depending on their sense of humor, they’ll use puns, wordplay, dark humor, sarcasm, or just send you memes.
A lot of flirting for the INFP often takes place online and over text. INFPs stalk their crush on social media to learn everything they can about them. They feel more comfortable meeting and talking online and over text than in person. For the INFP flirting means showing parts of themselves that they would normally keep inside. This is easier for them to do through writing than face to face.
Conversations with INFPs either get deep quickly or end. They ask lots of deep questions to understand the core of you. When INFPs like someone, they search for the light within them. They want to crack the shell of the persona and see beyond what everyone else is allowed to see. Unfortunately, INFPs can fall susceptible to loving the idea of a person more than the reality of them. However, over time people’s true feelings and intentions reveal themselves to the INFP.
Usually, the only thing that INFPs like about dating apps is that they don’t have to go out to meet people. They can stay home and get to know someone over messaging where they feel more comfortable. However, they find dating apps shallow in how people are matched and how the selection is largely based on a person’s pictures. INFPs almost never like the hookup culture and casual dating that dating apps promote.
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